Night Time Wonderments

Do you ever have those moments when you start to wonder the weirdest things, regardless of what you should be doing?

Jeff and I are trying to go bed early, which for us means going upstairs at 10:00, instead of 11:00 or later. We've been fairly successful, so I'm pretty happy, and it's made getting up in the morning not such a horrible prospect. However, there are those times when I just lay there, and my mind starts to whirl, and poor Jeff has to listen to my "wonderments".

So, last night it's really quiet, and we had just started to really relax, when, after a thought-train (you know, when you start with one thought, and then that leads you to another, and then to another, and on and on, until you arrive at something completely and totally unrelated?), I bust out with, "Why doesn't Whoopie Goldberg have eyebrows?" Jeff did a vocal double-take, and says, "Wha . . .? I have no idea. Why don't you put it in your blog?" And then he turned over and was breathing deeply in about 2 seconds.

Out of sympathy for his need to sleep, I let it go, so I'm taking his advice and putting it to you, my blog readers. Why doesn't Whoopie Goldberg have eyebrows? Is is a cultural thing? A nod back to an ancient custom of the Egyptian courts? A comedienne thing? Is it on purpose or the result of a medical condition? A fashion statement? Has she ever had eyebrows? Like I said, just something I was wondering.

Oh, and I should tell you, the whole Whoopie Goldberg/eyebrow thing came about because I was thinking about the new DVD I just got for our family that has Warner Bros. and MGM studios Oscar nominated shorts, and then that made me think about the other Warner Bros. cartoon collections that I have, and then I thought about the disclaimer that all the discs have about the racial jokes and misogynistic themes, etc., not being appropriate, but that they aren't going to take them out of the shorts because the cartoons are a product of their times, and they're not going to pretend that it never happened, and did I believe that explanation or not, and that when I was a kid I didn't get any of the jokes and sight gags, but now that I'm a "grown-up" I'm really kind of surprised at the things that they put in there. And for one of the collections they don't just have screen for you to read, but Whoopie Goldberg does this whole schpiel of explanation. Which then made me think about her eyebrows.

Just in case you were wondering.

It's not you, it's me...

Have you ever heard the old adage that if you have had 1 really difficult roommate, then it's probably their problem; if you've had 2 or 3 difficult roommates, then it might be your problem; but if you've had more than 3 difficult roommates, then it's definitely your problem?

Well, people's comments about my last post have made me pause for a moment of self-reflection, and I think, ya know, it might not be everyone else? Perhaps I need to take a step back from the Chicago driver that I am, and enjoy a little more southern hospitality. Maybe.

I'm willing to concede that it might not be such a great idea to be uber-agressive, especially because I want to also be a safe driver. Not to mention that I don't want my insurance to go up, for any reason.

However, to answer your question, I have only gotten 3 tickets in my entire life (that I remember, anyway), and only 2 of those were for speeding. But I must admit, I got one of the tickets because I rear-ended someone while getting off the tollway (Eastbound I-90, getting off on the Rt. 53 exit towards Woodfield Mall, for those who happen to know Chicago roads), more than likely because I was going too fast, so I'm willing to concede that speeding was definitely a contributing factor.

And it's not really that I drive that fast, really, but I do drive with quite a bit of impatience. But growing up in Chicago, that's how you do. After all, you know you're from Chicago if . . .

• You measure distance in minutes
• You know that the minimum acceptable speed limit on the tollway is 75 mph. Anything less is considered downright sissy.
• You know that Chicago has it's own version of traffic rules called, "Hold on and Pray"
• You know that the far left lane is the PASSING lane, and you know how to use it (meaning, you don't just hang out there!!!!)

So, all I'm saying is that I'm a product of my culture. However, I am also willing to admit that my way is not the only way, and maybe I need to just relax; be a little more zen about the whole thing. It would be nice, after all, not to yell at other drivers for being slow, or pound the steering wheel in frustration, or arrive somewhere in a bad mood because everyone around me is acting like such a moron. And who knows, maybe I might even start to enjoy how people drive here.

Ok, probably not, but I'll let you know how it goes. :o)

Driving Pet Peeves

Well, it's that time of year again; the pools have closed, the nights are a little cooler, and a few leaves have even started to change color. Yes, school has started back up, and you all know what that means: stupid drivers!!!!

As I am necessarily driving more--back and forth to carpool, to the gym, etc.--I am reminded once again that people don't drive the way that they should. That is, they don't drive like me. :o)

Instead of just screaming while I grind my teeth in frustration and wringing my hands on the steering wheel in an attempt to not plow into the person in front of me out of frustration, I thought I would do a quick vent, and put down just my top 3 driving pet peeves.

1. Drivers who don't go the speed limit. Come on!!! If it says 45, that's because you can safely go 45!! They checked and everything! And if you're going 5 under, DON'T obstinantely stay in the left lane (which is called the "passing lane" for a reason!), because "everyone should learn from your example."
--Corollory to Pet Peeve #1 are those drivers who go the exact same speed as the car next to them on a two lane highway, thus making it impossible for anyone to get around them. Arrrrggghhhh!!!!!!

2. Drivers who don't go right when the light or arrow turns green. I know, we've all been there, you're waiting at the light, not paying attention, when, whoops. . . but if you're the first person, you have to pay attention!!! If you don't, and then you get through, but hardly anyone else does, well, that's just selfishness. You have an obligation to make sure that as many cars get through the light as possible. Particularly the light on Louisburg, turning left onto Fox Rd. Which is, funnily enough, where Fox Road Elementary School happens to be.

3. Drivers who don't pull up all the way to the line at a red light. This is something that I still have never understood in my 7 years of living in North Carolina. And it's something that I have only seen in North Carolina.
Why do they leave room for an entire other car in front of them? Is there a ghost car? Are they leaving room for another car that might want to come to the light at the last minute? Is this a gross miscarriage of the famous southern hospitality that North Carolina is famous for? What possible purpose does it have? Other than giving me an aneurysm, of course.
I have noticed that 9 times out of ten (but not every time) it is an older driver that does this inexplicable thing, so I think that it must have been a misprint in the Student Driver Education manual that got handed around until they finally got the state funds to reprint the books several years later. Just a theory.

Well, I feel better, having gotten that off my chest, and I hope you do to. And any of you with information (especially about that NC oddity I mentioned) feel free to comment away. :o)

mommy moments

My friend Gail does this monthly post where she writes down all the cute, funny, and brilliant (her kids are geniuses, literally) things that her kids' say. Well, my kids aren't geniuses--although they are very smart--but they do say some funny things that I would like to keep track of. So, with thanks to Gail for her great idea, here are some of my recent "mom moments":

"That man is not being good! Meg chose Hercules, so he needs to find himself another girl!"

~ Taran, while watching the Disney movie, Hercules, after Hades threatens Meg when she doesn't want help him to find Hercules' weak spot

"Taran!! Mom cut my brain!!"
~ Kelcey, after I trimmed her bangs one afternoon

"I don't want to be Sleeping Beauty. They always kiss, and that's gross."

~ Taran, telling Jarom which princess she wants to be for Halloween

I'll post more when they occur (I hope!) but I thought that these couple were pretty cute, no?