One of My Best Blessings

This morning was horrible, and humbling, and wonderful, almost all at the same time. Today I had to bake bread for the week, so I started grinding the wheat while the kids were watching Sesame Street. Kelcey was home from school with a fever, but was doing much, much better.

While the wheat was grinding I sat in the chair in the Family Room and did some hand sewing that I’ve been needing to do, so my back was to the kitchen. Plus, the volume on the TV was really loud so that the kids could hear it above the wheat grinder. Which all means that I couldn’t see or hear what was going on in the kitchen. Ben had gotten up, but I thought that he went up to the playroom. Not so.

When I finished enough sewing to take a break and get up, I saw that Ben had taken the top off of the grinder, and a bunch of the wheat had spilled. And then he played in it so that it was all over the place. EVERYWHERE. It was all over the counter and the floor, all the way to the kitchen table.

I was operating under a fairly tight schedule (when am I not?) of grinding wheat, then baking bread, and then paying bills, and then putting a photo book together, not to mention the 7 other things I had on my to-do list, and today is piano lessons, and Activity Girls, and Cub Scouts, and… I saw it all going down the drain. I was totally overwhelmed, and I just couldn’t see how I was going to get it all cleaned up, and then do everything else too.

So, the horrible part?  I am extremely ashamed to say that I lost it. Completely.  Horribly.

I started screaming and crying, asking, how he could do that? I grabbed Ben, gave him a three really hard swats, took him into the bathroom for a time-out and set him down (none too gently, either), and then beat on the closet door so that I wouldn’t beat my child.  Seriously, my thumbs are bruised from hitting the door so hard.  Oh, I am so pathetic!

I told Heavenly Father that I just couldn’t do this, that it was all too hard—and somehow, it wasn’t just the wheat anymore, it was the pregnancy, and the kids, and all of the other things that I have to do.

After screaming and crying a little bit more, I got the heck out of Dodge, because I knew that I just had to get out of the situation before I did anything that I would regret. More than I already do, anyway.

You know, I had thought that I was doing a pretty good job with the pregnancy hormones, not letting them get the best of me, not being “that” mom, , but then something like this happens, and I am out for the count. Sigh…

So, I just sat there, blubbering and feeling overwhelmed and sorry for myself, when my mom called to ask me a question. I think the Lord knew that I needed serious help, because there was no coincidence about the timing of that call. My mom has always been my best support, and able to help me with whatever I need—talk me off the proverbial ledge, if you will—and she really helped this time. By the time I explained everything, and she gave me some suggestions, I was able to calm down, and stop crying, and realize that it wasn’t the end of the world.

Ok, so here’s the really wonderful part: While I had locked myself away, crying and feeling like I couldn’t handle it anymore, Kelcey, all by herself, got out the sweeper and dust pan, and just started cleaning up. She even shook out the rug so that she could get all the wheat that had gotten on that as well. By the time I emerged, telling myself that "I. Can. Do. This!", Kelcey had a whole section of the floor clear. She gave me such a sweet smile (not even holding a grudge because I had screamed and scared her and Ben half to death) and said, “Look, Mommy! I’m cleaning up!” She even asked if we could clean up together.

I was so humbled, and so truly grateful for everything she had done. All of a sudden, it didn’t seem so overwhelming, and I knew that I could do it, especially with her help and loving attitude. Together, we cleaned up it all in about 20 minutes.

Mostly I am so grateful for her sweet spirit of love and service, willing to help me, even though I totally didn’t deserve it, but she knew that I needed it. She just saw that I needed help, and she started cleaning. Without me saying a word. And she even knew how she should clean up!

As I think about it, I am just so humbled that the Lord helped me in my moment of need, sending my own personal angels: first my mom to help me calm down, and then my little girl, barely 6 years old, who gave loving service when I felt like I couldn’t do it all by myself. Because of them, I didn’t have to do it all by myself. I wasn’t alone. Just like we’re never really alone. He always knows what we need. I still can’t believe that my prayers were answered so quickly and completely, especially when I had just proved how messed up I really was.

This is one of my most amazing, absolutely wonderful, favorite moments with Kelcey, and I never want to forget it. I am so unbelievably lucky to have her for my daughter. She is one of my best blessings.

Potty Training - 4th time's the charm

Once we were sufficiently recovered from our Disney trip (read: all the laundry was done, and we had milk in the house again) I decided that we were going to potty train Ben. He really got interested in using the toilet while we were on our trip, I think because I dragged him into every single one since I had to go all the time, so he had more exposure than usual. Plus he's just ready, and it was time.

We bought 4 packages of Lightning McQueen underwear (his choice) and on Monday we went cold turkey. He only had one accident before he figured out what "that feeling" was, and he went in the toilet way more times than he didn't.

However, Tuesday was a totally different story. He absolutely refused to use the toilet, notwithstanding my begging, tears, and bribes. The honeymoon was over, you could say. The only way I broke through to him was to wait until he literally couldn't hold it anymore and was peeing down his leg, then picked him up, and just sat him down so that he finished on the toilet. Then, of course, I made a big deal about how great he did, and broke out the chocolate candy that I was saving for rewarding #2 behavior.

Since then it has been much, much, much better. He hasn't had an accident in two days, and he will come and tell me when he has to go, so I don't have to follow him around like a hovering hummingbird, constantly asking if he needs to "use the potty". 

Frankly, even though this is my 4th child, potty training still kind of freaks me out, so I am grateful beyond words that Ben seems to have "gotten" it so quickly.  Yet another tender mercy, no?

Plus, I think the fact that I switched to M&M's for the reward has also helped a lot. I mean, really, who doesn't love chocolate?

Walt Disney World 2012

We just got back from our Walt Disney World trip a couple of weeks ago, which was awesome, as you can imagine, and completely magical. Which makes sense, cause it's Disney World, and all.

One really nice thing is that we stayed in the "cabins" at Walt Disney World (they are actually trailers, with logs nailed around the outside, but it was still very nice) and you could park right in front of your individual cabin. Plus there was a little kitchen, a separate bedroom, and a Murphy-bed in the living room that Jeff and I used, so we had more space to spread out, compared to a regular hotel room.

We booked our trip through AAA, and one of our perks was a "diamond" parking pass, so we got to park really close to the entrances of the parks. Compared with waiting for the buses, wrestling our stroller onto the bus, and then riding the bus with a ton of people, and wrestling our stroller off the bus, etc. this was a dream come true! We just walked out of our cabin, got in the car, drove to the park, went to our special little parking area, and walked in. Most of the time it only took around 15 minutes (and hardly ever more than a 1/2 hour) to get from our front door to being inside the parks.

Unfortunately, I was already pretty wiped out with fun activities because the kids had been tracked out for 3 weeks before we went, and we'd done museums, and parks, and play dates until I was ready to cry. I think I did a couple of times, actually. Pregnancy hormones are the best. Also, the kids were sick of each other from all the "togetherness" of the previous 3 weeks, so there was more arguing amongst the troops than I think there otherwise would have been.

Note to self: either do big trips at the beginning of track-out, or just take the kids out of school. They'll enjoy it more, and I won't be so tired. On the whole, I think I did pretty well, though, considering that I was at the end of my 2nd trimester, and waddling around like a duck out of water. A duck with varicose veins, no less.

We tried to give Jarom and Taran some "big kid time" in each of the parks, so we would split up for a little while each day, and Jeff would take the two oldest on the roller-coasters that I couldn't go on anyway, and I would take the little kids and do something else fun. Of course, that usually included a "magical" trip to the bathroom as well, because of yes, the aforementioned pregnancy. I think I literally visited every single bathroom in every single park at least once during our trip, if not more than once.

Dad and the big kids really enjoyed Space Mountain, Splash Mountain (Kelcey got to go on that one too), Mission Space, the Rockin' Roller Coaster, and Star Tours. However, Expedition Everest was too high (shocker), and the Tower of Terror was just, well, terrifying. I know, I know. You're thinking, you let an 8 and 10 year old ride those? Poor judgment on our part, I agree, but they really, really wanted to, and they fit the height requirement, so I figured it couldn't be too bad.

Yeah, I was wrong.

But I think our favorite rides were actually the ones we got to do altogether, like Pirates of the Caribbean, or Winnie the Pooh—especially Toy Story Mania, a ride at Hollywood Studios, where you try to hit 3D targets like you're in a carnival. But a gazillion times cooler than that! It was the only ride that they kids said, as they were getting off the ride, "We've got to do that again!"

One of the coolest things that we were able to do was to meet quite a few Characters while we were there. 

Kelcey got to meet Snow White:

We had lunch with Winnie the Pooh and his friends:

They met Tinkerbell (Jarom said that he didn't want to go, but later admitted that she was pretty funny):

Ben got to meet Lightning McQueen and Mater:

Taran got to meet King Louis:

and then we got  to have dinner with Cinderella and 4 other princesses!  (the girls were in absolute HEAVEN):

We also had a couple of extra fun moments while we were there.  While we were on the Carousel in Fantasyland we realized that Taran and Kelcey were riding Cinderella's horse!  We had read about it in a trivia book I checked out of the library, and had been keeping our eyes out for it.  (Also, a cast member told us that they were on Cinderella's horse, so it's true, right?)  Apparently, it's the only one with a gold ribbon on the tail. Pretty neat. 

And we found the mystery wedding ring in the pavement at the Haunted Mansion!  We had been looking for it, but I guess when they re-did the ride they moved it from where it was at the exit, to a place in the waiting line in the cemetary.  The first time through we missed it, but we asked a cast memeber where it was, so when we went through later that night, we were looking very closely, and Jarom found it!  So cool!

We all had a truly fantastic time, and each of the kids has longingly sighed, at one time or another, "Mom, I wish we were back in Disney World." Even Ben has asked several times to go back to the "Tiny Chairs," his name for our cabin, because there was a child size table and chairs in a corner.

Even with all the small issues, it was absolutely wonderful, and actually, yeah, Jeff and I wish we could go back too. :o)